this technique will change your day

When you woke up this morning, before you got out of bed, what 'script' did you play in your mind? 

Was it along the lines of this?

Argh! Monday!

I don't want to get out of bed...

I've got that 'thing' at work that I don't want to do. What if I mess it up?  What will my boss think?  My performance appraisal is going to be bad this time. 

Sigh!  I've put on so much weight.  I hate my hair. 

I'm so disorganised!  I'm going to be late!!  I hate Mondays!!!

Imagine the morale at work if these were 'key messages' routinely promulgated over the loud speaker system by your PR department.  If you heard them often enough, you'd be feeling pretty low.

Now, imagine saying exactly the same things to a child: 'You hate Mondays. You don't want to go to school. What if you mess it up? What will your teacher think?  Your report is going to be really bad. You look awful. You're going to be late.  It will be a terrible day...'

Most of us wouldn't dream of speaking like this, because we're acutely aware of the damage these words might cause to the child's self-esteem.  We know instinctively the kind of rotten day that might unfold for the poor kid after a pep talk like that! 

What's the difference when we talk to ourselves?  Are we magically immune to the negativity in these statements, just because we're adults?

The way we 'communicate' with ourselves, like the way we communicate with children, has an enormous impact on our attitude and confidence.  It also has a direct link to our results.

Think about someone you know whose positive attitude you admire.  What kind of results does this person seem to get (even if things don't go according to plan)?  When this person falls over and scuffs their knees, how long do they take to dust themselves off?

Imagine the script for 'self talk' that might be running when he or she wakes up each morning, and write it down.

Run that script tomorrow morning, and every morning, until you're in a new habit of telling yourself things that will serve - rather than sabotage - your day.

And remember the Golden Rule: only ever say things to yourself that you would feel completely comfortable whispering into the ears of a child...